He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
