2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
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