You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
