Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
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