He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
