If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
