I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
this hospital has no fireball
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
