Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
