I wannas sexs uuuuu
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
