Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
