Its about making memories worth repressing
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Randomize
