My brain says no but my pants say off.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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