Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize