They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
