can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
