Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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