I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
