Kiss
Puke
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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