Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
