I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
