I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize