I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Randomize
