I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i just had sex bonerless
im about as happy as oj after his trial
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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