I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
