ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
