Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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