Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
