6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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