Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
