Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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