I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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