I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
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