He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
