I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
