i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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