What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
only you would photoshop your dick
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Randomize
