So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
