Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
