I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I think your dad took our porno
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize
