you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
