so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
