Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
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