I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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