Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Randomize
