i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
