Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
