let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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