he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
