Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Randomize
