are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Randomize
